Love is Stronger Than Hate. - 4/11/14

26 years ago. 26 years ago I was getting ready to enter this world for the first time. My mom was only a few weeks away from delivering a beautiful baby girl, therein giving me my mortal body. Somewhere in that 26 years I've forgotten the beautiful gift my body is. Whether it be the world's or my own negative influence, something along the way told me that my body wasn't good enough how it is, that I needed to be skinnier and prettier and just better. For some reason I trusted that ridiculous notion more than messages from my Heavenly Father letting me know that I am beautiful just the way I am.  Even worse, I have come to take my body for granted, to only think of it in a negative connotation. How dare I!? I get one shot at this life, one shot at proving that I deserve my mortal body, and for 26 years I have been undeserving of that shot.

It is time to make a switch.  They always say that "Love is stronger than hate", and I couldn't agree more...but that doesn't mean it comes without work.  Too often in life, in general, do we let hate be the driving force behind our actions: "I hate my body, I need to change it", "I hate the way I do this, I need to change it", "I hate that my clothes/house/kids aren't as good as hers/his", etc.  How often does this mentality actually drive us to change?  I mean permanent, positive change.  Sure, maybe for a few days, or even a few weeks, but at least for me that change never seems to stick.  I get discouraged and negative and just fall into more hate.  I want love to be the driving force behind my actions, and am starting today to apply phrases like the following into my life:

"I love my body, therefore I take care of it."
(by eating healthy food and exercising regularly)

"I love my Heavenly Father, and to show that love I show respect to the mortal body He has given me."

"I love being healthy and feeling good."

"I love me just the way I am."

Etc.

If I can change the way I see my body or my health, I can change my lifestyle.  As an example, I'm taking a moment for Storytime:
The one time I was successful for a long period of time at exercising and eating right was about a year and a half ago or so.  We had been married for a while, and were at about 2 1/2 - 3 years of infertility.  I went to the doctor and was doing everything I should to follow her "orders" and still no success, but I felt like we were getting closer.  At one of my appointments I got on the scale and saw a number I didn't like, followed by changing into a hospital gown with a body shape I didn't like woke me up to the fact that I wasn't ready to house a fetus...my body wasn't terrible, but it was not where it needed to be to be the ideal place for a precious, growing baby.  Instead of thinking "Ugh, I hate me, I need to lose weight and be skinny and perfect, etc" my mentality was all about taking care of and loving someone else by taking care of me..."I want to be the best I can be", "I want to be healthy and a good mom", etc.  POSITIVE VERBIAGE!  It seriously made the biggest difference.  In the following 3-6 months I felt better than I ever had.  I started eating more "clean food".  I went to the gym regularly.  I tried to stop saying negative things about my body (hey, no one is perfect).  And guess what happened?  I Lost Weight.  18 lbs, I think it was..in just 3 short months and I was able to keep it off for the next six.  This was all cut short when I got in a bad car accident, screwed up my body too bad to work out for a while, and got out of the habit of working out.  Needless to say the weight, laziness, and bad body image came back, but I learned a valuable lesson from that experience:

Love is Stronger Than Hate.  

The more I focused on loving my body and taking care of it, the easier it was to stay motivated to be healthy and the better I felt.  Not only was my body changing, but so were my ways of thinking and my moods/emotions.  I was a better wife, a better friend, and all around a better person.  I started thinking about the things that mattered the most in my life and the changes kept coming.

I don't know how everything changed back so quickly, but I know it had something to do with hate.  I am tired of hate!  I commit now to make a change.  I know it will be slow, it won't happen over night, and there will be stumbling blocks along the way, but I will make a change - in the wise words of Yoda "There is no try, only do" (you're welcome, Bradley).  As part of that change I am going to be more like my awesome soul-sister, Lara, and blog more.  When I blog I am holding myself accountable, and when I hold myself accountable I am more apt to succeed.

Thank you to all the supporters and friends, please keep coming back and commenting.  On the flip side, don't keep reading my/our blog if you aren't a supporter/friend because I have no room for haters, and you'll get real tired of this blog real quick to boot ;)  I'll post about all kinds of things, but there will be frequent personal updates, so buckle up ya'll!

Lots of Loves,
Chels.