(I need to give a shout out to not only my awesome and dedicated visiting teacher, but just all around great friend Lisa for always following promptings by the spirit and sharing spiritual insight with me that I need to hear. This post is inspired by her and pushed to publishing because of my scripture reading last night that backed her up.)
I struggle with disrespectful people; in any setting, really, but especially when you have an obligation to be around each other, i.e. work, projects, jury duty? You get the point. Lately I've been really hung up on a few people specifically, and for respect's sake I will try to remain as vague as possible. But basically I have let my feelings get the best of me and have let these people make me feel inadequate. Therefore, I have started to resent them and their lack of respect for me while trying to keep my decency and respect for them, the motivation to keep doing so dwindling by the day...I cringe just being around them, watching their eyes roll at everything I say, being afraid to say anything at all in fear of being humiliated, feeling like an outcast, trying not to become someone I'm not to fit in with these people I disagree with, is the picture being painted? I only give back story so that I can make my point...I'm almost there, promise.
So today, my sweet friend Lisa came to visit and some of the things she said were like bricks hitting me in the face telling me to change my feelings about these people. She mentioned that sometimes we let the things people say affect us in a way that they didn't mean it. We interpret what they say to fit our own agenda, or in this case, to prove that we must be right about how we feel. "Oh they definitely meant to offend me" or "did you hear that tone?" Or one of my favorites "they didn't say that exactly, but it was implied". How can we be sure? Now I still believe the eye rolls and the blatant ignoring of anything that I say is hard to justify me misunderstanding, but I may be overreacting slightly. It's like once you let something bug you then you start finding reasons for it to bug you more...tiny little insignificant reasons, that you never would have noticed otherwise. We must stop scratching this itch! Take things in stride!
After having this heart to heart with myself, I opened my scriptures to read before bed and was again, hit with more bricks. I was reading in the Book of Mormon when Christ is visiting the Americas after his death and resurrection. He is instructing people on how to treat each other and there is very little room for interpretation. He is straight forward and almost a little brash in his counsel. "Judge not that he be not judged". Stop judging! Don't do it. Not now, not ever. He goes on to say that no one is perfect and no one lives without imperfections so until you fix every single, little thing that is wrong with your own self there is absolutely no room for you to spend any time finding fault with others. None. He also mentions the timeless, golden rule to treat others the way you want to be treated. No exceptions. You don't like someone, they bother you, you don't get along? Is it ok to treat them with disrespect? Absolutely not!
So to bring this all full circle, here is what I want to reiterate: no one is perfect, not you, not me, not anyone; it is not ok to treat people with anything but decency, respect, and really love, even if all you get from them is the opposite; there is no time to waste judging other people, or comparing yourself to them (for good or for bad), everyone will get what's coming to them and it's not your job to try to figure out what that is.
Lastly, never be afraid to share happy thoughts with other people. Whether you are religious or not, if you feel strongly that you should share something with a friend or loved one, do it!!! Where would I be today without my dear friend who always has the courage to share with people around her! Thank you to everyone who teaches me lessons in my life...good or bad. We learn from everyone we come in contact with. It is up to us what lesson we take from our encounters. Think about that the next time you want to say something negative about another.
Lots of loves,
Chels.
Chels.
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